My desk is momentarily cleaned off and I thought I would stop by…
I am feeling good…for many years it was unsafe to go back…here is what I mean…my life at one point turned to a real life nightmare…at that point, I did not want to drag any of my friends through it…so I stayed away from everyone…it did not mean I did not love them or did not care…I was not safe and did not have a right to put others in that danger…in the last year many of those very special people have found their way back into my life…it has shown me how wonderful they are and how very lucky I am
It was 15 years ago today I took my last beating…a strange anniversary to celebrate…though it has been a busy day, there has been a strange undercurrent of freedom…I am soon to turn 45…I never thought I would make it this far…there is life after abuse…and it can be good
On a lighter note…things have been moving fast this week…every time I thought there would be time to chill the phone would ring…it is good to be busy…the rain that has been falling has been leaving this brown film on everything…which has created a lot of extra cleaning…massage has kept me hopping…sore shoulders and stiff backs…the 90 year old that tried to take up jogging to impress his 80 neighbor had me shaking my head…Chris and I have been on Skype most every day…it is great to be back in the groove of life and have the creativity juices flowing…class time has been great…I have to admit I am really impressed at the level of education…the teachers are great…also the other students really seem to get into it…I think it makes the class a lot of fun and the information much easier to absorb…it has led to some very cool conservations…I have been putting together my non-profit status for ‘The Circle of Boudica’…The Induction Ceremony is private…I am very nervous…I will take pictures when I can and post them…
Someone asked me once would I go back and change anything…the answer is no…the beatings were horrid and have left a mark on my soul…it was hard to bury children…at the time I wondered why…a few years ago I stopped wondering…in one day mind you…I went to the hospital to see a client…on my way to his room I got stuck in the elevator with a young woman who had lost her child…when we came out of the elevator we both had a different prospective than when we had gone in…I got to the shop and my first client was an abuser…it was something I felt and he confirmed…this was a difficult session for both of us…I agreed to take him as a client only if he would get counseling…he followed through with both…he has become a wonderful husband and father…again perspective had been altered…I got home that night and was woken by a knock at the door…it was a friend who had just been hit…I said nothing and tended her wounds…she seemed puzzled that I did not get upset…she had brought her daughter with her…I asked one simple question ‘What are you going to do when this happens to her?’ It was a similar question that made me get away from the beatings…it would kill me to think of any of my children to be on either end of it…3 months later she moved on her own…Damb, here is that perspective thing again…in a moment of deep meditation I could see clearly…I couldn’t have helped any of those people had I not walked the road I walked…I am glad to be able to help others…I choose to keep a positive perspective on it all…something good came from something so ugly
So for today, let’s celebrate life…the air we breathe, the ground we walk on, the water that flows through our bodies…
For Bumps and Bruises (In the following order)
Rest
Ice
Compression
Elevation
May you all be blessed with never having such an anniversary…if you have a candle…burn it and pray for those who need it, to get to safety…
Blessed Be,
D
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